stretching...

Falling in love with love...
It sounds sweet doesn't it?

Though the notion can be quite romantic...
I find most of the time...
The sheer choice of the day to days...
Is quite stretching.

As I looked in the mirror today...
I quickly noted...
My late- 30's belly is more than stretched.
Being pregnant 5 times and this last one...
Well...

The journey turned my anatomy into a science experiment.

Being pregnant with triplets is NO JOKE.
Those closest to me saw the crazy things it did to my structure.
One week... not looking pregnant at all...
The next... I looked ready to deliver.
Because my identical sons were extremely sick...
My body was battling severe fluid retention...
A fight that was all too quickly lost.
By my 23rd and 24th week I could barely walk.
Carrying love of this kind was breaking me open.

So... 
As I gazed this morning...
I remembered.

The art of Loving...

And carrying love...

It is uncomfortably stretching!

Since we have embarked on this project...
Love has been growing and stripping me...
In ways that are less than attractive...

Ways that make me want to hide....
Offering love through a masked version of whom I was created to be.

And though I rather like things to be in place and not be so wholly worn...

There is something sacred about flesh giving way to love...
So the very core of who we are...
Is reshaped...

Marked and made into something new...
Changed forever.

The smallest story-gifts...
They have been my biggest teaching tools.

Charli has been proven to carry enough heart and spirit...
For her and her two brothers.

With each new day...
Especially days when I would like to hit the "reset button..."

I am thankful for the grace and new mercies...
He has placed in my hand.

And that He keeps on stretching...
So I might keep on keeping on...
Being a student of love.


Falling in love with love...
It isn't glamorous...
But it is raw beauty.
And I celebrate the stretching that is forever changing my structure...
Swollen tummies... swelling hearts and all.

this week...

This week...

My heart and mind have felt a bit like a two year old...

Very emotional...

Easily discouraged...

Quick to forget lessons My Daddy has lovingly taught.

This week...

Has been a week for exercising faith muscles.

Remembering...
Love doesn't always feel romantic.
But it is always a choice.

This week...
Being in love means...
Choosing to press in to truth even when the eyes of my heart feel lost.

Aware that some of the wildest treasures can actually blind us.

This week has been a week for me to explore new territories of my heart...

Repenting for long forgotten sins hiding for an opportune time...

Being lovingly redirected by those that love.

Our God is so kind to bless us with traveling partners...
Brothers and sisters that help guide when we don't quite know which path to take.

Truth is...
Not just this week...
But, every week...
I need Jesus...
With every breath I need Him.
I will NEVER need Him less...
The need only grows.

He is so aware...
We were created with a God-shaped hole...
That ever increases with each encounter.

And... He promises to never leave...
Often choosing to tenderly manifest Himself through another needy sojourner.

He is worshipped when we offer the love He has stretched us with...
To another story He so deeply loves.

This week I am thankful for His Holy Spirit.
For Truth...
For Grace...
For brothers and sisters that model love...
And for His sufficient blood that is always...
More than enough for two year old hearts.

Interceding for other hearts this week that have perhaps felt a little lost...
Praying against lies of discouragement...
And thankful for our King Jesus who lives to intercede on our behalf and remind us...
Whose we are.

what if...

In my own life...
In the past...
I have lived with a pauper mentality.

This was not my desired path...
And the honest truth is...
Even in the scarcest times growing up...
We always had plenty.

My spirit...
My soul...
My heart...
Has too often offered out of a poverty mindset.

With my defenses up...

The lie that directed my steps...
"What if there's not enough?"
"Not enough love..."
"Not enough talents..."
"Not enough time..."
"Not enough resources?"

I have lived a daughter-afraid.
What if...
I give the best I have away...
I esteem the other...
And there just isn't anything left?

This mindset has died...
But old patterns...
They can be hard to unlearn.

I am unlearning...

Allowing the old labels I have worn around since childhood...

To no longer define me.

God in His mercy...
Has equipped us with renewable minds.
To my joy...
And many days... to my surprise...

This old momma...
She is a learner of new tricks.

In discovery...
I ask myself...
What if...
I daily lived out what I know to be true...
Our God in His extravagance...
Loves to bless...
Remembering.... His economy has no end!
I have freedom to celebrate what He is up to in others.
I can love sacrificially...
I don't have to stow away...
Hiding and hoarding treasures for myself...
Because He invites all hungrys to...
"COME... Eat... drink... and be SATISFIED."
He fill us to the overflow... not out of leftovers...
But out of HIS RICHES!

The I AM...
Is not the "I was" until I ran out.
He has met our deepest need...
He is meeting our deepest needs...
He will meet our deepest needs.
ALWAYS seeing you...
ALWAYS seeing me...
ALWAYS inviting us to step into MORE ABUNDANCE.

Thank You...
For not leaving me as a Pauper.
Thank you for reminding me that as Your princess...
I am free to give EVERYTHING away...
Because in Your Kingdom...
Your love...
Your provisions...
They are overflowing...
And they change everything.

Everything!
Even the most pauper-prone princess.

What if...
We all BELIEVED...
That He is who He is says He is...
And He can do ALL that He says He will?

What if we believed...
We are who He says we are?
What if?

It is happening!

Philippians 4:19
He shall supply all your needs... 
Out of His glorious riches... 
(emphasis added)

loving is facing hard truths...

Truth is...

Our boxes ...

Over at The Rose...

Are overflowing with love treasures.

Our cups from love's fruit...
Literally runneth over.

Our plates...
Filled with overflowing abundance.

The jewels that occupy space at Faith...
They are blessings I treasure up daily.

We have more...

Than our growing arms can hold...

Too much love...

To keep just for ourselves...

We must give it away.

The smalls and I are enjoying celebrating...
But we are also busy learning.
Today... 
Whether Hallmark-made or not...
It reminds the heart...
Everyday is an opportunity to express The Father's heart for one another.

And though this Valentines Day...

Affection abounds... 

Providing sweets for my heart...

The Spirit is faithful to tenderly teach in the joy gifts.
Today...
Many are filled with ache...
Too many to be numbered...
Are in need of a supernatural touch of love.

So we press on in the...
Celebrating...
Loving...
And learning that loving well means facing hard truths.

Today's love lesson....
"The truth is that 143 million orphaned children and the 11 million who starve to death or die
from preventable diseases and the 8.5 million who work as child slaves, prostitutes, or under
other horrific conditions and the 2.3 million who live with HIV add up to 164.8 million NEEDY
children.  And though at first glance that looks like a big number, 2.1 billion PEOPLE ON THIS EARTH PROCLAIM TO BE CHRISTIANS."

"The truth is that if only 8% of the Christians would care for ONE more child, there would NOT BE ANY STATISTICS LEFT."

Facing the hard truth...
That sometimes we need to close our eyes to fear...
And risk in costly love...

I don't know what that looks like for our family...
But... with knowledge comes responsibility.
How can we not be part of the 8% that changes the face of a mountain...
Where radical love puts an end to such statistics?

Happy...
Heavy...
Learning...
Facing hard truths.
Asking...
And wondering.

super...

In life...

In love...

We all need to know...

Someone is for us.

That we are seen...

By someone who cares enough...

To fight...

Drawing out the "super" in us when life seems dark.

Most of the time...

That means...

We must embrace the super in our own lives.

Just think...

What would happen...

If all God's "supers..."

Came together...

In unity...

Fully believing...

In Him...

In who He has made us to be...

Joyfully celebrating each other.

In the midst of the battles...

His sword of truth...

Is such a critical tool.

We must keep our eyes...

Fixed on its light.

Many times it can be so hard to remember truth...
Lies easily creep in...
Temptation to compare... steals power.

If I really want to love with all I am...
I must also fall in love with the super He created inside of me.
Being super isn't something I must strive to achieve...
It is something I must embrace.

Because like The Best Daddy...
When He looks at His smalls...
He smiles with delight...
Not because of what they have done...
But because of Whose they are...
Pointing His affection...
Straight at us...

Whispering to all of His smalls...

"I see YOU...  ALL of you... and I think your amazingly super!"

Isaiah 43:1

"I have called you by NAME...

YOU are mine."

What could be more super than that?

love letter...

We have been...

INTENTIONALLY fashioned to be learners.

Which means...
Each day is marked with new...
Discoveries...
Humilities...
Adventures...
And treasures.

Paths...
Lined with innumerable opportunities...
to stand amazed...

In awe of...

Just how much..
The Father's heart...
Is BURSTING with love and desire for His people.

Love letters...
His beloved Son...
His best...
His riches...
His EVERYTHING...
He has given...
So we might be so lavished...
Hungered to participate in the joys of
Being a chapter of His love letter to the world.

Stories...

Offering love...

To bless.... 

Helping bandage the broken.

The words we offer in love have POWER!

They release The Father's heart into the stories of others...

Breaking through storms...

Inviting them into the mysterious joy of covenantal love...

"The Never Stopping...

Never Giving up...

Unbreaking...

Always and Forever Love!"

He creates...

He calls...

He teaches...

He gives full life...

He gives His whole-love...

He gives us the words.

We watch and learn and try to repeat.

Offering our all...

Our best...

Our entire lives as love letters.

Because this is what He has... is... and will continue to do for all of us.

For the Father loves the Son and shows him ALL he does."

John 5:19,20